I am just a teenager but among all the things I have gone through, one insignificant mistake every parent makes is blaming their child for eating too much or too less.
Let me elaborate. I grew up in a family that fed me quite a lot to maintain my health. But instead I grew fat. Very fat. Then they nagged me for being so fat and not working on being slimmer. Whenever I refused to eat more than I wanted, they scolded me for “showing attitude” and fed me more.
With puberty, the comments became too negative to bear, even if they weren’t. I realised that this needs to stop. I worked out every day for an hour. Sometimes cycling, sometimes jogging. But whenever I shed weight and stopped working out, I doubled in size. This became a repeated pattern.
Then one day, a sudden realisation hit me. I had once overheard my school nurse speaking to someone that one doesn’t get fat by eating junk food, but rather when they eat too much. This made me think. And suddenly the newspaper articles titled “Eat less but often” started making sense. I decided to cut my food intake.
So now everyday I danced for 1-1.5 hours and ate less with no dinner. I didn’t cut any fried food, cheese, chocolates like many people do, but only ate less. If I wanted to eat, I thought of my sweaty hardwork and drink water, and I no longer felt hungry. Dieting is very easy as long as you don’t think of the taste of food and drink water (water suffices hunger). You may have a hard time believing, but I lost more than 10 Kgs in 3 months! My body literally changed and everyone said that I got half of who I was. I was still fat, but average fat that would look graceful and won’t interfere with my activities. This also helped me identify my correct appetite, which many do not know.
But in spite of this, my family didn’t stop pestering me. They couldn’t get over my older habit of gobbling food like a maniac and nagged me for being moody and ungrateful. I was done. I calmly stated that I didn’t mean to hurt any feelings but only I can control my diet and because I live with my body and know it the most, I get to choose when to eat what and by how much. This made everyone realise that when I claim to be full, I mean it and I won’t eat to please them anymore.
At times my grandmother still gives me extra portion out of love, but that’s fine. She stops when I insist.
I won’t ever have kids but I still think that my child won’t have to eat to please me. Unless or until that child is getting extreme and unhealthy, I won’t question their diet or nag them for being moody just because they aren’t gobbling down fats at dinner. Discussions and suggestions would go both ways, because that is how a child learns to communicate their feelings freely.
P.S.- I am gaining a bit of weight again because I haven’t been able to work out regularly due to studies and am having dinners again. But it’s cool I’m not that fat and I will go back to my proper routine once all these exams are over. Senior year really takes a lot of time from your schedule.
Song of the day!!
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